For the record, like most people, I too have a love-hate relationship with the gym. I hate the gym for the obvious reasons – the reminder of how weak my muscles are, how quickly I start wheezing for air, and how much weight I should lose. But I love the gym. Yes, the gym can provide a great endorphin rush and make me feel great, but that’s not why I love it. I love the gym because it’s got great people watching. It’s always entertaining watching the different people – the distinct gym personalities. You know what I’m talking about, right? I’m thinking I should start a gym personality game. Maybe a bingo card?
There are the guys that have huge ripped upper bodies and itty bitty legs.
Come on now, balance it out baby! You look like you’re going to tip over. Legs are equally deserving of your attention.
There’s the perfectly coiffed and made-up woman.
Are you really planning on working out? If so, how do you plan on not sweating? Bonus points if the chick is chatting away on a cell phone.
What about the chatty Cathy (or Kevin)? You can do your cardio and several different weight machines and these people are still standing there talking and haven’t lifted a thing. (Shall we include the poor sap that’s trying to perform a set of reps while the chatter box is talking to them?)
There’s the teenagers that think they’re too cool (but then what teenager doesn’t). You’ve got the grunters, the sweaters, the smelly people. There’s the older people who look like they will break but are actually doing decent cardio and/or weights – you go grandma and grandpa! There’s the people lip syncing and moving their head and/or body to whatever music is guiding their workout.
Then there are the tattoos. I also love looking at tattoos. There’s always people with really good ones and lots of people with really bad ones. Maybe instead of bingo we need a game with a point system. Then you can get different amounts of points for the different tattoos; like 10 points for each astrological tattoo you see; 50 points when you see Asian characters; 100 points for a tramp stamp and so on.
I’m sure I’ve missed many other common gym personalities. Keep in mind that many of these personalities are not mutually exclusive. Imagine a bad tattoo on the bulging arms of man with skinny legs who’s sweaty, smelly, and grunting.
For the record, I’m one of the dancing/grooving fools lip syncing my tunes. Once I’ve created and perfected my new gym playlist, I’ll share what I’m grooving to with you. But now, I’ve got to ask, what gym personality are you?